Tatiana Azundris

= good-looking

We are very pleased to report that you are in the top half of OkCupid's most attractive users. The scales recently tipped in your favor, and we thought you'd like to know.

That's already funny because has worked with good photographers isn't quite the same as hawt, but the amusement doesn't end there.

I think it's funny that grown adults would find (the) writing style (of Lord of the Rings) too dense or boring when I didn't at eight years old.
–Slythwolf

I think the Wolf has her analysis backwards here, because what she observed coincides 100 % with what I'd expect.

If an adult reads Tolkien, chances are that they have already seen a lot of what's good in Tolkien's books in derivative works, so that the originals will hold much less wonder and surprise – leaving only the bits that weren't so stellar. If on the other hand you're eight years old and Lord of the Rings is one of the first fantasy books you read, it's far easier to get pulled in by universe and forgive the faults (the writing, the absence of women, etc.).

In other words, I think what you think of a work that counts as a milestone depends a lot on how many derivative works you have consumed beforehand.

Some things work only once, and if you had that aha! while consuming a derived work, experiencing the original later will seem much less impressive – it did, after all, not give you an epiphany (as you already got that from the enhanced work or copycat).

By that token, I also find the Beatles mindbogglingly boring, while some people credit them with the musical equivalent of inventing the wheel. Well, even so, their work has been expanded on so much that by now, it looks like one of those wheels they use in B.C. or the Flintstones. You appreciate the historic value, but you wouldn't want to use it on a daily basis. The WalkMan was a great step up in portable music from the ghettoblaster, but I still wouldn't trade you my MP3 player for one.

By popular demand, here's more material from the Silk scarf/latex session. 'nuf said.

For once, we're following up our last installment within the week!

What
Samsonite sleep mask.

Where
Amazon etc.

The Good

• Nose-guard. This mask has an extra fold that goes between nose and eyes intended to keep the light out.
• Toned-down look. More professional-looking than most alternatives when going on a transatlantic flight with colleagues.
• Size adjustable.
• Comes with ear plugs.

The Bad

• It's in anthracite. That's already far better than white, but I prefer black on the inside, just to be on the safe side. This isn't outright bad, but could arguably be better.
• The strap fastens with velcro. If you have short hair, that's fine. Otherwise, you may or may not get your hair stuck in the velcro if you simply wear the mask, but you certainly will if you ever adjust the strap while wearing the mask.
• If the size and shape of your nose aren't what the designers figured they should be, the nose-guard — which otherwise is a great idea — can be irritating and uncomfortable.

Addendum: kikka holds up his own with what looks suspiciously like our Exhibit V.

As announced in the last installment, this time it's about the grim meathook future where it's all about sleep. Or well, that's how the props worked out. In fact, the original concept had a riding crop instead of Iustitia's sword, but wouldn't you know it, there wasn't a crop to be found in the building, and the ostrich feather that was used instead never made it into the final selection. But yeah, it seems a fair enough superheroine concept, Lady Justice, sort of a mix of Iustitia, the Judge from B:TAS, and not a touch of Lady Death!

What
Black silk scarf.

Where
Ye olde sex shoppe — or pretty much anywhere, really.

The Good

• Silk! More pleasant to the touch than most other solutions, even in warm weather.
• Versatile. The more layers you fold in, the higher the opacity.
• One size fits most.
• If your nose tentpoles enough for light to get it, you can simply fold one or two extra layers to include the entirety of it into your little world of darkness. No nose too large, no nose too small!
• Soft for a snug fit; likely won't move when you turn your head on the pillow.
• A good choice even if you're on a budget.

The Bad

• The knot has to go somewhere, and we don't mean "in front," so there's always one side — left, right, or back of the head — that you can't rest on, and chances are that as soon as you've literally tied the knot, that's how you want to rest.
• If you do this while drunk, you might end up tieing your hair into the knot.

Wow, just Detox. Not d-tox, or deTox, or even detoXX. Guess the '90s are over.

Take picture of self, GIMP it up.
For extra credit, publish original.

So, beautiful's too easy, eh?
Well, it's not like I didn't rise to the challenge.

Auto-White Balance, Select Foreground, Brightness/Contrast, Make Wonderful

The problem is, this shit is bogus. Like in The Laws of Thermodynamics.

If you don't have a patriarchy-approved body, nothing you do is "pretty." And, you know, you don't get to quit the game. You get dissed for having the audacity of displaying a non-fuckable body in public.

If you do have a P-approved body, you don't get out, either. If you do mainstream pornisation, some men will get off on it. If you do mainstream gross-out, many men will still get off on it. You only get to choose between signifying sex or signifying chicks are dumb sluts (and therefore unthreatening). You do not get to quit the game.

But no worries, 40, 45, 50, something like that, we'll quit the game for ya, and you'll become invisible. Welcome to the Patriarchy.

Take picture of self, GIMP it up.
For extra credit, publish original.

I don't normally do relays, but hey. If dyfa and Thilde do it, then so can I.

Auto-White Balance, Crop, Brightness/contrast, freehand + fill (to remove background in layer copy)

… I pose with a gun. On the internet.¹

Common wisdom has it that within the week, I'll shoot up my school. Are you ready to pick up the Seven Day Challenge with me?

I knew you were.

It's been a while; I've been out and about like crazy again. Which of course means I once more had need for sleep masks. Today's is, in fact, one of the first ones I ever bought, back before the grim meathook future where it's all about sleep. This is one of the playful ones that was half about sleep …

… and half about, Squeeeeeee! Sleepmask! I'll be like Audrey in "Breakfast at Tiffany's"!

What
Plush sleep mask.

Where
via Amazon.

The Good

• Mmmmmh, fluffy!
• Generously sized. Will probably cover your eyes.
• Soft for a snug fit; likely won't move when you turn your head on the pillow.
• Sufficiently large space for the nose so it doesn't press on it when worn.

The Bad

• It's white. Yes, even on the inside. I mean seriously, what were they thinking? If you open your eyes with the mask on, it's not dark. If that doesn't bother you, go ahead and buy this one, but in that case, you may not need a sleep mask in the first place.
• Size not adjustable. One size fits most (if only just) elastic band. Fit a bit snug for my taste/head.
• Space for nose somewhat large, and thus more likely to let in light.
• Fluffy. You won't be wearing this in the dead of Summer.
• Most men probably wouldn't be very comfortable wearing this in public, say, on a plane. But maybe, I should list this as good: You can signal you're very secure in your sexuality/gender.

When people wear silly things, it's Halloween, or BDSM.

Only sometimes, it's just a weary traveller in search of some sleep …

What
BDSM mask.

Where
Your friendly neighborhood kink-store, or We Fetishize Oppression Wholesale, Ltd.

The Good

• Black on both sides. Opaque.
• Size adjustable (buckle). Long strap.
• Sufficiently large space for the nose so it doesn't press on it when worn.

The Bad

• The leather, of course, is rigid and inflexible. If you turn your head to the side so that mask meets pillow, the mask will not bend, but move — and likely leave the light in.
• Space for nose somewhat large, and thus more likely to let in light.
• Might earn you funny looks on the plane, but may pass for dark sunglasses from a few seats away.

There's a new set of petticoat pictures in the photo section or, like we said on the mailing list, my (goth)rock-star outfit.

Hey now, you're a Rock Star, get the show on, get paid …

One of the fabulous subversive words invented by the incomparable twisty — more on her in the "footnote" — is empowerful. Empowerful as in empowered, the prefix em-, like en- or in- denoting that the power is invested in her from without, lest somebody think that females might be naturally powerful. The distinction matters.

Empowerment is a rather fitting word though, as it is traditionally suggested that the power held by women is sexual power. In other words, sexuality grants women "power" over men who hold actual, real power. Women use that vile witchy power of sexuality to "control men" and channel some of those men's power into themselves, thereby empowering themselves. This obviously is quite different from finding her own power within, that is, actually being powerful by herself, rather than by proxy. It follows quite naturally that the more sexuality a woman can express, the more empowerful she is. It is for this reason that women aide in their own pornification. This pornification, some may say, is reaching new heights both in intensity (in the current fetish fashion and raunch culture) and extent (the pornification of preteens; "corporate paedophilia"). Enough maybe for some to think that it has come to the point where something's gotta give, where only a backlash can follow, but personally, I'm not so sure. That this will happen. That if it happens it will be a backlash that makes things better for women.

This of course means that there are women who don't get to be empowerful: those who cannot or will not conform to beauty standards; those who will not pornify themselves, the fat and the old and the butch and, oftentimes, the poor. It also means that if you end up in one of those groups — by gaining weight, getting old, getting bored with the effort of the performance that is beauty, or otherwise not being a feast for the male gaze and thereby neglecting your duties as a member of the sex class —, you fall out of favour, and lose "your" power, as it is only by power by proxy, and never was yours to begin with.

This is particularly interesting when considering how well we're told many 1^st world women do in school and uni in recent years. It would certainly be instructive to investigate to what degree this finding intersects with that that nowadays, we exist to the degree that we exist in the media. Which, if we stick to the modes of expression traditionally allowed to us, reinforces those stereotypes, of course.

Way back in the seventies, before I was born, when the world was young and dinosaurs walked the earth, a Steely Dan promo for radio DJs came with a tacky t-shirt. It was pink. Which was useless given most DJs were men. And it only had the words "Steely Dan t-shirt" printed on it. It was, however, incredibly, -credibly rare, so it became a sought-after collector's item.

Steely Dan themselves commented on that in another song, Show Business Kids: "They got the house on the corner, with rug inside; they got the booze they need, all that money can buy; they got the shapely body, they got the Steely Dan t-shirt" — casting the shirt as the ultimate empty status symbol.

This is how I remember the story. I'm making a special point out of not looking it up to check, because it's a legend, guys, drift is practically a requirement! That said, the Steely Dan site usually makes for a good read. And so do the Steely Dan dictionary and possibly the interpretations site.

Anyway, I always wanted one, because it was so … HHOS or something. Not taking itself seriously to just the right degree.

They reprinted for the current tour.